Not only did we have wheat spaghetti for dinner tonight, but it had to be made by my husband. By the time I’d get home from work, it’d nearly be time for me and my husband to leave for my grandparents. So Nate willingly agreed to make dinner.
It hit me afterward that this was a very clever plan. He would have to dislike his own cooking if he claimed to hate the wheat spaghetti. And isn’t there some kind of man-code that goes against that? Doesn’t pride keep them from really hating their own cooking? (Unlike us women who can very easily hate and trash a dinner that we’ve made. A certain chicken pot pie experiment comes to my mind…).
Anyway, whether it was man-pride or just his willingness to stray away from our beloved white pasta, he actually didn’t mind the dinner at all. He didn’t come out and say that he loved it. He didn’t beg me to buy wheat pasta from now on. But he said that it wasn’t as bad as he thought it’d be, and I took that as a positive step in the right direction. 🙂 Even I enjoyed it, which I wasn’t sure if I was going to.
But his willingness to give wheat pasta a try opened a can of worms, so to speak. During our marriage prep classes, our pastor had constantly reminded us that marriage is all about compromise. You have to give a little and take a little, but ultimately it’s not all about you and what you want. And I thought this would be easy and thought that I was good at this. But then it happened…
I had a dose of reality. I realized that I’ve been saying ‘no’ a lot lately… as though my opinion is the only one that matters. Now some things had to be stopped, such as the huge over-stuffed couch for the living room or the manly bedspread he would have picked out. I mean, he’s a guy. He’s naturally going to choose man-cave options, and it’s my duty as a wife to keep this place feeling comfy, cozy, and warm. Right?? But then he decided that he wanted to put his beloved projector in our bedroom. That meant a black box above the bed, wires streaming down the wall, and a bedroom that needed to be kept white. In other words, I wouldn’t be able to paint the bedroom anytime soon. Which meant my new bedspread which just came in the mail would have to stay in its package even longer.
I’ll admit that I have grand dreams for the master bedroom, but — honestly — I could just as easily finish up the two bathrooms first. And by compromising like that, I’d make my husband happy. That and — in the end — the room will end up being painted and the projector will be moved anyway. Why can’t I just wait a few more months?
So I compromised, and Nate is very happy because of it. And I’m transferring my excitement over decorating to the two bathrooms for now. So we’re both happy… and how can you get any better than that?