When Nate and I were engaged, we attended mandatory classes on marriage that were held at my church. Marriage prep-classes. They were very informative, chock-full of wise tidbits that we could practically use in our every-day lives together. My pastor warned us that once the dating scene was over and we were living together, we would find out that our precious lover had some… well… baggage. It may have come as a surprise to some that their fiance had issues, hangups, or ‘quirks’ that they weren’t aware of yet. But not to me…
Because when Nate and I were engaged, I attended mandatory classes on marriage that were held by a few wise philosophers. Or, well, my best girl friends who were already married. And these young women warned me. He was going to have baggage — bad habits I’d want to cure him of, ‘quirks’ I wouldn’t find cute, and maybe — sometimes — he’d forget what a hamper was. Shudder!
But what no one warned Nate that I was coming with baggage. Literally. Eight crates of it.
For the record, I did warn him that I liked to read… And that, in highschool, I was the worst-dressed girl, because I used every penny I had to buy books. (“You can’t wear books,” my mom would say). So when we were married, I decided to kind of break him to the news real easy. I’d have my dad drop off a crate to the apartment one week, and then Nate would go to my parent’s house and pick up a crate the next week. But there was no hiding the truth once our entire storage unit was completely filled with eight, large crates of heavy books.
At that point, Nate just kind of stood there with his mouth hanging open. It was like he saw Moby Dick swimming in the closet, rather than a classic piece of literature with the same name.
I tried to convince him that this was a good thing. That someday, our children would thank me, because they wouldn’t even need a library card. They could just step into our own personal library. (Because — someday — I will have a room for all of my books). Nate tried to convince me to get rid of a few. But that didn’t last long, because I managed to throw away three books after digging through five crates. It really wasn’t worth all the effort.
And so I kept them… And now, the eight crates have followed us into our new home and are filling up a quarter of the basement. My husband just shakes his head… but he still loves me. 🙂
So the moral of the story is that you never know what kind of baggage your significant other may bring to the table. So sometimes, you just have to be willing to be flexible.
(Oh, and for the record, my husband does know what a hamper is. And he’s most definitely the guy for me, because he’s going to learn how to build bookshelves). 🙂